جک انگلیسی

AiSaN_SpOrT

عضو جدید
Little Tommy was doing very badly in math. His parents had tried everything: tutors, they tried everything they could think of. Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Tommy down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Tommy came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother hello. Instead, he went to his room and started studying. Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Tommy was hard at work. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner and to her shock, the minute he was done he marched back to his room without a word and in no time he was back hitting the books as hard as before. This went on for some time, day after day while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference. Finally, little Tommy brought home his report card. He quietly laid it on the table and went up to his room and hit the books. With great trepidation, his Mom looked at it and to her surprise.... little Tommy got an A in math. She could no longer hold her curiosity. She went to his room and said: "Son, whaaaat was it???? Was it the nuns??" Little Tommy looked at her and shook his head, "no." "Well, then", she replied, "was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms???? WHHHHAAAATTTT was it????" Little Tommy looked at her and said, "Well, on the first day of school, when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around."
 

AiSaN_SpOrT

عضو جدید
 



Patty was sitting in her back yard digging a hole to bury her dead goldfish. Mrs. Johnson, who lived next door, was watching her over the fence

?Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, what are you doing

Patty said, "I'm digging a hole to bury my dead goldfish

?Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, don't you think that hole is a little BIG for a goldfish

!Patty said, "No...it's inside your damn cat
 

AiSaN_SpOrT

عضو جدید
Detroit-area woman who was removed from a jury for commenting about the ongoing case on Facebook has a longer writing task ahead: a five-page essay about the constitutional right to a fair trial


She responded, "Can I just get the answer from Wikipedia and send it to the inbox on your Facebook page instead?
 

AiSaN_SpOrT

عضو جدید
How well will you do on your New Year’s Resolutions? Here’s a brief history of some my recent ones:


2008: I will go to church every Sunday

2009: I will go to church as often as possible

2010: I will set aside time each day for prayer and meditation

2011: I will try to catch the late night sermonette on TV
 

hadadi500

عضو جدید
Marriage is like a public toiletThose waiting outside are desperate to get in
&
Those inside are desperate to come

ازدواج مثل توالت عمومی میمونه!!بیرون هر دو تا باشی دوست داری واردش بشی!!!
&
واردشون که شدی دوست داری هر چه سریعتر از اون خارج بشی!!!!
 
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